Writing

 I always admired any writings by anybody. Even a simple self proclamation, musings like this to classic writings. I wondered why I admire them.

My friend named Satheesh from my Engineering (Undergraduate) used to talk mostly in English during our one to one conversation. His English would be full of grammatical errors and not well formed sentence but he still will be able to convey his idea and his enthusiasm will stick to you. I don't think he has written anything subsequent but it gives me the answer on why I admire writings (from how he speaks eloquently - here eloquent does not mean with grammatical correctness). It is the confidence one have which I admire and would like to acquire.

I get my complexes on seeing many of fellow readers who write letters to Jeyamohan commenting on an article or sharing an emotion. I have been his reader and also has been reading literature seriously for at least 10 years now and could not write such a well formed article. I immediately shoot this back to having poor vocabulary. But now thinking through I understand it is the lack of confidence in myself and also issues I have namely 

1) Incomplete reading

• Not enough concentration - Mind wandering through various other plans and idea, Materialistic - The reading topic may quickly make me think about my family, information I learn from it, relate the emotion to myself, worry about my financial situation, Ego - What new idea/information can this writing add
• Attitude - Instead of reading something really I feel like to have the "reading attitude" meaning people would view me as "this person is a reader"

2) Not enough practice

• Not enough vocabulary - Not able to remember new words irrespective of the language (Tamil or English)
• Think through an idea completely and convey them in a proper order/structure   

I am planning to work on it this New Year.